Lady Elizabeth Meets Queen Gaga

Gags has met the Queen B and the two couldn't have gelled more. I kid, the only thing reminiscent of gel in this hot shot is whatever artificial substance has been used to give Gaga her junkie raw panda eyes. Queen is confused, but is also the Guinness World Record holder for holding her shit tucked tightly in a conservative brain so the old girl smiled and played along with her surroundings - responding when talked too and urinating on the yellow light.

Gaga felt shit good - and who wouldn't after mingling with fancy old women who have their own body weight in jewelry 3 fold! You'd play along with this gal even if she wanted to ride you like a donkey (naked).

True to form, Gaga pulled some major tricks and got freaky with a piano. People commented she could have done the same set but on solid ground - Gaga responded with her usual performance art blab - and lost 50 more Australian fans who are over her pretense and junk.

Brandy Wins Skinniest Bitch @ Timbaland's Party Vote

Every doughnut lover in the land (except Brandy - who has her own personal strugglz) showed up to the debut of Timbaland's nu album; The Sound Of Pots N Pans Going Clang Clang - Part 2.

For some really really weird reason Jojo has got in on this project. What is her big deal?

Also in attendance was the SheRilla Serena Williams, who bought along an old man then played along with Brandy's skinny crusade and let a photo be taken.

Fat Joe also rocked up. Say NO more. This guy has real problems.

Katy Perry - Ur So Nong!

Im so confused about Katy Perry - not a fan or a h8er. Is she even fun? Maybe? ... I'm stumped.

What You Covering Gwenny Gwen?

I'm not in the mood for declaring pregnancy, so I'll have to interpret this mooshy looking coat thing as some Gwen-fashion-forward-thinking and go get me a rug and wear it to the disco.

Van Der fuck

This is without doubt one of the most precious faces of depressing times past. With a forehead the size of your regular building brick, some sluggy eyebrows and an acting career that'll induce a gag reflex to get you hurling creek water - this is not a fun dude.

Intelligently 1 of the females of the world has said NO to having Van Der Beek as a damn ugly surname and divorced him for being a fucken maniac through and through. Unfortunately his gennies have taken up camp in some chick (the blonde) he smuggled home from Israel. It wont be long till she wakes up one night to the brutal reality check - shes been sexing the child of a refrigerator.

Katie's Night Out

The talented Ms Price has set a new personal best for filling her insides with drug related substances! Katie had a whirlwind of fun as a semi conscious her acted paraplegic all over London town. After gnawing off her low lip and dislocating everything (her neck, her wrists, her eye balls, men's balls, lots of dicks... ect) Katie retired to her limousine to pee on a stick and declare pregnancy to an emu. The baby is due in May 2010 and she would like to name it Gorgeous Ikkiwiki Nocotumbar Swarovski Price.

My Name Is Aretha

And I wish you a merry christmasssssssssssssssss

!!!

Grammy Time

So it's time for another award ceremony and I'm desperate to watch, but only because I love celebs. That said I have had the lowest points of my life watching award shows - they are depressing and borderline suicide inducing. They are so bad, but because Beyonce is sitting on a chair somewhere, I'll give it my 3 hours of human existence. Speaking of Beyonce, Our Girl (yeh I'm like related now homegirl style) she has got 10 gram nomis, I hope she sweeps the thing like a hungry blob at an expensive buffet. But I also want grammyville to give Gaga something because whatever is on her head that night deserves to be on worldwide television. And she knows it.

Heres the nomis for record of the year. Can you believe these songs are fucken big deals and the sound of my arse farting isnt? Oh we'll theres always next year.

Record Of The Year (Award to the Artist and to the Producer(s), Recording Engineer(s) and/or Mixer(s), if other than the artist.) Halo Beyoncé Beyoncé Knowles & Ryan Tedder, producers; Jim Caruana, Mark "Spike" Stent & Ryan Tedder, engineers/mixers Track from: I Am... Sasha Fierce [Music World Music / Columbia] I Gotta Feeling The Black Eyed Peas David Guetta & Frederick Riesterer, producers; will.i.am, Dylan "3-D" Dresdow & Padraic "Padlock" Kerin, engineers/mixers [Interscope] Use Somebody Kings Of Leon Jacquire King & Angelo Petraglia, producers; Jacquire King, engineer/mixer [RCA Records] Poker Face Lady Gaga RedOne, producer; Robert Orton, RedOne & Dave Russell, engineers/mixers Track from: The Fame [Streamline/Interscope/Konlive/Cherrytree] You Belong With Me Taylor Swift Nathan Chapman & Taylor Swift, producers; Chad Carlson & Justin Niebank, engineers/mixers [Big Machine Records]

OooH Eyy

What Can I Say?

So with November drawing to a close I felt all itcy about this thing thats been counting my every move. You couldnt take a long shit and this robot tally thing not know how many brownies you've dropped lately. It's onto me. So what can we gather; I was majorly perky to be blogging in Feb, got shit lazy in July, bought it back in Sep, had to much time on hand in October, then got distracted in November.

I guess thats my year.

I curse the thought of 2010.

Mumma

Somehow I clicked some rancid link to see who were the successful sons of these sexy ladies. Can you guess who the fuck is who. I knew the majority of em (2 out of 3 - a pass) but was far more entertained by the glorious trendsetters at the wooden table. Oh yehhh they luvv the salon & gettin they hair did.

I Am... Isis Fierce

For some (Tina Knowles related) reason, Beyonce went for a tour of the Giza plateau when she was skippin by Egypt. Of corse she got some Egypt big gun to talk spinxy with her and she tut tut'ed back. Unfortunately he didn't like her arse, abused her in arab and the meet 'n' greet was ova.

Fun notes; she wore metallic lipstick just to make Cleopatra's spirit majorly jealous/pissed - because they didnt have no Lorel lip sparkle back then ... heck you'd be lucky if someone would grind up an old rock so you could get some coloured shit to line your mouth.

True

Been Googlin

I've been google'image searching seahorses again. They R so AmAzInG!

The American Music Awards Highlights

Obviously!!! Nelly Furtado being herself;

Nelly is so fucken bonkers let me tell you. She is The Queen of nonsense and couldn't even play sane if Timbaland asker her too. I'm guessing he tries anyway, she'd sell more albums if we could remotely relate to her.

Riri sang a bit out of tune, but only to match her inconsistent outfit.

She also felt a bit cheeky getting lasers in the eyes of the audience. Rumor reports Whitney Huston didnt enjoy the bright red flashes reminding her of her naughty time with the coppas.

And Gaga played the creep in the corner - (look at that face')