Still Here?

It's literally been years since I've thought of these two, and the dry taste I get in my mouth when I think of them. Oddly they're still alive! And he (being over 60) continues to look like 'generic old man' and she, a fan of the eternal frozen face and the garden rake physique, continues to look like an unofficial, life-sized, synthetic Ally Mcbeal doll - made in Taiwan. The love however, is real, because a love like this is not too good to be true, it's artificial, so it must be real - and like anything plastic, this will take over a billion years to break down. After biological warfare wipes us all out, the dinosaurs return then die again, alien humanoids will rummage through earths crust - discovering my primary school lunch box, water bottles marked 'frantelle' and Calista and Harrison, creeping along arm in arm and as bloody boring as ever.

Date/Fuck/Marry - Who Would You?

I don't care how wealthy he is, that Mark Zukerberg character is a leech out of Hell who must be stopped at any cost. Sure I saw and hated The Social Network, who didn't, it's also gave me a resentment for rich, socially repulsive nerds.

And it should be pretty obvious what we should all want to do to Snoop Dogg.

How To Recognise An Idiot... By Their Leg

... yeh and I'm the smell of your clothes 3 days after it rained on them and they begun to mould. Oh so romantic.

Headline Of The Week!

Text Mum! Does she know!